Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
