Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
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