I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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