I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I just saw a hot homeless man
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize