that's an acceptable place to lick
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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