Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Randomize