the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
