Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Randomize
