Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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