We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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