do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
