She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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