fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
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