Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
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