I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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