glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize