just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize
