Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
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