So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
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