Acid is not a monday night drug
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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