I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
