i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
