i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
