Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize