Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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