I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
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