There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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