but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
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