Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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