That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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