Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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