This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
