I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
