i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
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