it wasn't lemon gatorade
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
