me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize
