CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Randomize
