Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I would fuck him just for his dog
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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