Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
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