i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize