Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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