what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
