whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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