I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
She tied me up with her honor cords...
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
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