May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize
