i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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