She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
