I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
