Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
