So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
