can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
