You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Randomize
