is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Randomize
